Jack and Jill went up the hill to gay marry George and Martha WashingtonPerhaps I missed it, but I don’t ever remember a specific unit on “straight” relationships in elementary school, but Tennessee wingnut legislator Stacey Campfield just wants to make sure that kids don’t learn about any part of reality that happens to be gay:

NASHVILLE, Tenn. ‚Äî A Democratic lawmaker from Memphis opposed to legislation that would prohibit teaching about gay relationships in Tennessee public schools told the Republican sponsor today that the practice is a “figment of his imagination.”

The proposal sponsored by Republican Rep. Stacey Campfield of Knoxville was sent back to the State Board of Education for further study by the House Education K-12 Subcommittee. It’s at least the second year that the same panel has killed the measure.

Campfield claimed to have proof that some state counties could be headed toward such teachings. For instance, he said one school system has removed filtering software from its class computers.

Rep. Ulysses Jones, a Memphis Democrat who voted against the bill, said Campfield’s claims are not factual.

“What we’re dealing with is a figment of his imagination,” Jones said. “This is not based on any evidence.”

The proposal sought to prohibit the “teaching of … human sexuality other than heterosexuality in public school grades K-8.”

Campfield said the state should “stay neutral” and leave it up to parents whether they want to talk about anything other than heterosexuality.

Because kids need to be protected from the harsh light of reality as long as possible.

Newsflash, little weasel: kids already learn about gay relationships, even in Tennessee, because they have gay family members, friends, parents, and the like. And no, they don’t learn about gay sex (the wingnut Stacey’s true fear) any more than they learn about straight sex from simply observing the fact that, oh look, their friend from school has two mommies.

Thank you, Ulysses Jones, for not pretending that Campfield’s little stunt has any intellectual merit, and calling it out as the fever dream that it is.

As the above article mentions, Campfield has been barking up this Caucasian Wingnut tree for a while now. When he first introduced it in 2008, he explained it like this:

“If I were to say ‘Jack and Jill went up the hill’ or ‘George Washington and Martha Washington were husband and wife,’ there are groups out there that would say we were pushing a heterosexual agenda. To keep those lawsuits from coming, I thought we should still be able to talk about that side of it,” Campfield says.

Really? Because Jack and Jill have been going up that hill for quite a long time now, but nowhere near as long as it’s been since George and Martha gay married each other heterosexually, and I haven’t heard of one lawsuit. Perhaps I don’t read the missives from Campfield’s mothership.

Anyway, the bill is basically dead until the Wingnut Wonder of Knoxville decides to bring it up again next year. Or until the bill dies laughing when Campfield is caught with his pants down at a rest stop or something.

A little more background on Stacey Campfield:

Over the years, Campfield has proposed other controversial legislation, such as replacing the state’s food tax with a tax on pornography and requiring the state to issue death certificates for aborted fetuses. In 2005, Campfield compared the state’s Black Caucus to the Ku Klux Klan when they refused to let him join because he is white.

Do you remember what I was saying just one post back about how wingnuts are never just wingnutty about one thing? They always are screwed up and paranoid about a whole list of things which pose no threat to them at all. Campfield’s hang-ups are generally “not being allowed to do something that black people can” and “not being able to control sexual activity that doesn’t involve his and other likeminded penises, subservient wives, and a hole in a sheet.”


And even more background on Stacey Campfield, about the time he got kicked out of a University of Tennessee football game on Halloween:

According to a report by UT Police Lt. Dana McReynolds, the Knoxville Republican was wearing a “Luchador’ (Mexican wrestler’) full head mask” during the game against South Carolina despite publicity before and during the game that Halloween masks were not allowed inside Neyland Stadium.

Campfield is not named in the narrative, but his identity was later learned by McReynolds through a driver’ license check. Campfield’ identity was confirmed Monday by UT spokeswoman Karen Collins.


McReynolds and a Knox County Sheriff’ Office deputy found the masked man and asked him to step into the portal.

“I told him masks were not allowed in the stadium and told him he would have to take it off,” McReynolds wrote. “He asked why and I again told him that masks were not allowed and he could either give the mask to me or take it off and put it away. Before I could finish my sentence he took off the mask and asked if he could keep it. I told him “yes’ and thanked him for complying.”

The officer noted that Campfield then re-entered the stadium area but went a different direction than his original seat.

“Curious about this odd behavior and concerned that he had misunderstood our interaction, I caught up with him in front of the concession stand in Section D,” McReynolds wrote. “I … began to tell him that I was not asking him to leave the section, just to take off his mask. Again … he interrupted and said, “I was just taking a walk. Is it illegal to walk around?’ I told him “no,’ and was surprised by his sudden confrontational attitude. … He again asked if walking around was illegal. I told him “no’ and again began to explain that he did not have to leave his seat, just take off the mask. He continued to ask if walking around was illegal. … Thinking that something was not right (he kept saying the same phrase over and over, would not make eye contact and kept shifting on his feet, left to right) I asked to see his ticket.”

And it just kept going…and going…and the wingnut child kept repeating the same words over and over again…

As we’ve seen so clearly in the Fulton, Mississippi story lately, another thing wingnuts have in common is that they’re essentially overgrown adolescents.

Campfield is is a pretty good sketch of the prototypical wingnut, really. Childish, not very bright, creepy, sex-obsessed, misogynistic, bigoted…

So anyway, now you know Stacey if you didn’t already. Don’t you wish you lived in Tennessee now?