Remember a few weeks ago when I made fun of Pastor Ken Hutcherson for trying to “reclaim” the rainbow? Now he wants to reclaim the word “gay,” claiming that he is the gayest person he knows. I always had my suspicions, but it’s not polite to judge:

Dr. Ken Hutcherson, the pastor of Antioch Baptist Church in Redmond, Wash., posted an announcement earlier this week that many close to him – including his wife – have known for years. Hutcherson revealed that he is the “gayest man I know.”

“Coming out of the closet is a difficult decision to make, especially when close, personal relationships are at stake,” Hutcherson wrote in his column, Hutch Speaks Out, that was published on WorldNetDaily.

Bwahaha, this is going to backfire on him.

“Will my family abandon me? Will my friends still look at me the same? Will this announcement be worth the risk? These are indeed valid concerns that can make a person live like a double agent for years. And even though this decision is acutely personal, it does help to stand alongside someone else who is ready to announce the very same thing,” he continued.

The announcement of the burly NFL-linebacker-turned-evangelical-minister-and-author sent some initial shockwaves through the Christian community. He and James Hansen, one of his ministry leaders who is married with three children, are challenging others, especially evangelicals, to come forward and also admit that they are gay.

Haha, okay, Peter LaBarbera, you and Bam Bam do it next.

But the thing is Hutcherson is not a homosexual, nor does the happily married man have a same-sex attraction of any kind. He is, however, on a mission to take back words, phrases and symbols he believes groups, such as homosexual activists and other liberal organizations, have “hijacked” from the American lexicon.

Okay, next I would like Ken to publicly take back loving Madonna and the freedom for two dudes to make out in public. Because we gays have just cold hijacked those things. Go ahead, Ken.

“Seriously, I am the gayest guy I know,” Hutcherson reiterated in an interview with The Christian Post.

God, you don’t have to broadcast it.

“My frustration is that some groups have taken words and symbols away from the Church and from society in general. When I say I’m ‘gay,’ what I mean is that I am happy, that I am joyful and that I love people. That is precisely what a Christian ought to be so in my opinion we just need to be as gay as we can.”

It’s great to be joyful and love people. Tony Perkins, Ken Hutcherson is asking you to be as gay as you can. Do you have what it takes?

“Dan Savage (a pro-gay activist) says he is gay. He’s not gay, not anywhere close. Yeah, he may be a homosexual but he certainly doesn’t appear to be happy or joyful when he stands up in front of a classroom and uses profane language. Nope, nothing gay about that.”

To be serious for just a moment: why do wingnuts think Dan Savage is unhappy? He has a great husband, a great kid and a great life. The fact that he makes fun of wingnuts doesn’t mean he’s unhappy. It means he’s quick on his feet and knows how to laugh at people, like Ken, who would seek to destroy his family unit.

Anyway, wingnuts, you have your marching orders from Hutch. Come out of the closet and be super-gay, like he is! Here is Ken’s full column, if you want to subject yourself to that.