Even when wingnuts find a black person to like, they can’t seem to do it without being horrifically racist.  It’s been fairly entertaining watching them fall all over themselves for Herman Cain [the GOP candidate who has never held elected office and who was genuinely befuddled when Chris Wallace asked him whether or not he supports the Palestinians’ right of return.  That is Palin-level ignorance right there.] simply because they are gleeful that maybe they have a black person too!!! Someone the other day — I can’t remember whom — pointed out that the Republican embrace of Cain probably has less to do with them being impressed with a black candidate, and more to do with them being impressed with themselves for liking a black candidate, because it allows them to go back to thinking they’re not racists.

Here’s Bryan Fischer of the hate group known as the American Family Association, commenting on the blackness of Herman Cain vis a vis President Obama’s blackness, and oh my god, just hold onto your chair:

He can’t talk enough about how white he is and how white his heritage is. And you compare that to, say, Herman Cain – you know, Herman Cain was just joking around about being the real Black man in the presidential race and President Obama kind of helping reinforce what Herman Cain has said in jest.

President Obama is half-white, and half-black; Herman Cain is all black; he’s authentically black; he is the real black man in the race.

So we’ll see how all of that plays out. I mean, President Obama celebrating his Irish heritage, I mean there is just something about that I just find, I just find that comical, frankly.

Okay, let me see if I can break Fischer’s argument down into its simplest parts:

1. Herman Cain is a REAL black man.
2. Obama talks too much about his white heritage to be a real black man.
3. Hahaha, how silly for Obama to talk about his Irish heritage, I mean, have you seen his skin?!?!  No, President Obama, you are not one of us.
4. In summary, and in conclusion, Herman Cain is my favorite black ever.  I mean, at least he spouts of the same garbage we do.

Am I interpreting Fischer correctly here? I think I am. Here’s Digby to elaborate a bit more:

Here’s the thing. Racist types always like the “good ones”, the ones who “know how to behave” and do all the right things. They always have. Unfortunately “most of them” aren’t “good ones.” (You know how “they” are.) Nothing racist about that at all.

Bingo! Herman Cain is okay because he’s one of the relatively small percentage of the black population which toes the wingnut line. Therefore he is one of the “good ones,” who, let’s stop pussyfooting around, “knows his place.” Meanwhile, Bryan Fischer has been, for the last couple of years, going completely apesh*t over whether Obama is “legitimate,” or a true American, because he’s simply not one of the “good ones.” Oh, and he has a funny name and Bryan is scared of anything that sounds Muslim.

Brought down to the level of the garden variety, non-media-savvy wingnut, it’s the same construction you hear from Southern Republicans all the time.  If you’re from the South, you’ll recognize this wingnut argument construction:

You know I don’t have a racist bone in my body!  I mean, we have black neighbors and they keep their yard BEAUTIFUL.  But [insert heavily racist rant about the possibility of a poor black woman getting to see a doctor before they do].

It’s a strange delusion, but if Cain advances, we’re going to see it come into play over the next few months, big time.

Here’s the video of Bryan stepping in it, again: