At this point, it’s unsurprising to hear that people who support the “ex-gay” industry are slithering all over the globe, desperately trying to find places where that message can gain a foothold.  LGBT people don’t have to do that, really, because we already know that we’re everywhere.  I found this delightful little article, though, from The Malta Independent about an Evangelical pastor named Gordon Manche, his “River of Love Chapel,” and his choice to bring three “ex-gays” to spread their message of dishonesty and self-hatred.  I call the article delightful, though, because the writer, Daphne Caruana Galizia, is indeed delightful.  You’ll see what I mean in the first few grafs, then click over to read the rest:

The Evangelical pastor Gordon Manche is upset because homosexuals picketed his River of Love chapel, carrying placards with messages like, ‘I used to have ginger hair, but now I’m saved’ and ‘I used to be left-handed but now I am healed’.

This happened after he publicised a ‘show and tell’ – I believe they’re called testimonials – by three unnamed men who described how they were homosexual until God converted them. Because they probably also believe that God made them (mandatory childhood catechism refrain: “Who made me?” “God made me.”), they must be wondering why it took God so damned long to realise there was a glitch on the production floor and then go back to undo his mistake.

“There you go, old chap. You can run after girls now. But don’t use a condom because I don’t like them.”

What’s more, God hasn’t sorted out that glitch yet, either. The factory seconds are coming out at the rate of one in 10, and they’re taking over whole cities like San Francisco. Why, there are now more homosexuals per square mile than are there people with ginger hair, even in Glasgow, and God isn’t doing anything about it except for the occasional spot of conversion in a chapel above a furniture showroom in Haz-Zebbug.

Delightful, right? I want to read everything she writes. On the subject of the general mindset of anti-gay wingnuts:

We’re dealing here with people who deny the existence of dinosaurs despite the evidence from fossils and the Malta Labour Party. If they think Tyrannosaurus rex is a hoax, they’ll have no problem believing that a couple of magic spells performed in a prayer circle, while men twang guitars and women in bad clothes sway about with their eyes closed, can make Elton John fancy women.

GO READ IT ALL, as there is so much more, and then check out her website.