linda-harvey-001Do you know who is to blame for America’s mortgage crisis?  If you said “greedy, unregulated bankers colluding with Wall Street to create massive instruments of bullsh*t designed to make greedy, unregulated bankers and Wall Street very rich very quick, with no regard for the actual homeowners being hurt in the process,” you would be wrong, wrong, wrong, because Linda Harvey, the pathetic little ball of hate who runs “Mission America,” who insanely claims that the “gay agenda” is to blame for gay teen suicide, states that the cause of the mortgage crisis is, of course, gay people.  No,  rilly, she is saying this:

The foolish man builds his house on sand ( Matthew 7:26) or even, builds his house with sand. What is being embraced is the sin-based family.

Families constructed around sexual deviance stand in defiance of God’s eternally –revealed truth. No matter how “conservatively” and faithfully two men or two women operate as they consider themselves a marital union, the structure is still in defiance of God’s created order of male and female as the framework for marriage.

Citation needed, from an actual authority. No, not your bigoted reading of an old book you’re not smart enough to understand. Try harder, Linda.

As Jesus told us in Matthew 19, a man and a woman constitute what He considers marriage. Humans are not created in a possibly “wrong-sex” body, as the transgender lobby would have us believe

And as medical science has actually confirmed…

but were designed as male and female “from the beginning”—and Jesus should know, since as the eternally- existent Savior who was God on earth, He was present at creation.

Citation needed, again.

So from the get-go, the same sex union is structurally unsound.

You have proven nothing, Linda. Back to the drawing board with ye!

Functionally, the intentions can be the best, but the homosexual humanists who have created their own law will live and die by it, because God has made His standard clear.

That’s probably the first time Linda has ever put the words “homosexual” and “human” next to each other.

Many say that divorce is a much greater threat to the family than homosexuality, and it’s true, but it’s a different problem with a different solution. In divorce, the problem is function, not structure. With counseling, and a change of heart and behavior, one can fix a troubled heterosexual union.

Uh, not always?

But let’s take two men, trying unsuccessfully to “consummate” their relationship. It is impossible. Forgive the graphics here, but neither oral nor anal sex, nor mutual masturbation will ever unify them structurally.

You have obviously never had gay male sex, Linda.  Wishing reality wasn’t there doesn’t actually make it go away.  It just teeters you ever closer to the edge of DSM-IV territory.

In fact, actual anatomical damage can occur through anal sex.

Well, if you’re having sex wrong, you can cause anatomical damage with vaginal sex too!  Moral of story:  have sex properly!  And don’t ask Linda Harvey for advice, because heaven knows she has no idea.

The other big clue is the lifelessness. No new life can ever come from a homosexual relationship. Those few who do desire children (a minority) always have to involve at least a third and possibly a fourth party. The options are adoption, artificial insemination, or inclusion of children from a previous marriage: yes, a heterosexual, fruitful one, back before the discovery of “inborn” homosexuality.

Uh, Linda? Words have meanings. Use them. A happy gay relationship is not “lifeless,” any more than a happy straight relationship between two people who don’t want children is “lifeless.” Moreover, gay couples who DO have children and create happy homes are no worse off than straight couples who have children and create happy homes. Oh, and a marriage between a closeted gay person and a straight person is not “fruitful.” Indeed, that’s the only relationship you’ve described which could be accurately called “lifeless.” I suggest that before you write your next column, you invest in a dictionary, Linda.

The awesome privilege of creating, with God’s help, new life from the love of two humans, is only available to male and female.

You all bring your deity to bed with you? Now that’s a weird threesome.

Even Japanese Buddhists or Native American shamans–those who don’t believe in God—- understand this structure.

Shhhh, nobody tell Linda about Native American beliefs on “two-spirited” people. She doesn’t like reality, and it doesn’t like her.

Sometimes it is violated by polygamy—usually multiple women with one man.

Like in the Bible.

Again, we turn to on function. What about the leaky roof? What about the abusive husband, the alcoholic wife? This functional flaw can be fixed and often is, through adherence to biblical standards of conduct. In stable communities, it’s the other dads and husbands who keep abusive men accountable, or the other women who encourage the substance abuser to get her act together.

Uh, it’s really cute when fundamentalist Christians, whose divorce rates are actually worse than the general population, lecture the rest of us on how to fix “functional flaws” in abusive marriages. Adorable, really. When will these people ever grasp the fact that their way of life is being rejected by more and more people every year because it’s inferior?

You’re probably wondering when we’re going to get to the part about the mortgage crisis, but Linda is extremely verbose, boring and mostly unreadable. Let’s skip a bunch of crap and head straight to that part:

The mortgage crisis was the sin of temptation being offered by those who relaxed legitimate standards, offered to those without the personal standards to resist. This easy-pay physical structure was too good to be true, and appealed to an increasingly covetous segment of our culture. Sexual and material covetousness are usually sin siblings. It would be interesting to study the families who have defaulted on mortgages for the correlations between structural and/or functional weaknesses like infidelity, divorce, gambling or porn addictions, job instability, credit card default, domestic abuse, sexual deviance, and criminality. There is also a high likelihood that poor or no church attendance would show up as a factor as well.

Uh, actually, the bankers preyed on homebuyers, the elderly, minorities and all manner of other people. Moreoever, Linda, you have no evidence for your insipid suggestion that those who defaulted on their loans were probably really big sinners in other areas, or that they didn’t go to church. But this is textbook Linda Harvey: spew a bunch of hateful, unproven/disproven crap, let the leeches who actually respect her [all twelve of them] read it and find targets upon whom to manifest their rage, and call it a day’s work of serving “The Lord.”

But back to our main point, probably few such households are homosexually-headed, because few homosexuals want to settle down to any kind of permanence

Citation needed, you troll!

Many unmarried mothers of children born out of wedlock are on public assistance, which means they are unlikely to have had a mortgage. So when we look at the mortgage crisis, we could analyze it as a shift in the American family, but these families would not begin to reflect where the greatest structural weaknesses already exist.

Or Linda could just do a bit of reading and find out where and how the mortgage crisis sprang into being…but nah. Reading is hard. So is Googling. Keep on writing dumb crap, Linda. It’s the only thing you know how to do.

[h/t Brian @ Right Wing Watch]